Dead Shots and Long Falls

An Essay Regarding Atticus and My Parents Surprises

By Jennifer Carroll

 Pine Point School

8^th Grade English

10/22/10

My parents, when they were younger, went skydiving in Arizona. I was stunned when I learned of this adventure in their lives. I never thought of my parents as people would even dare go to a Gucci store during a sale, let alone jump out of an airplane. I was shocked and a little happy that they weren’t boring people after all, and I think that this is what Jem and Scout must have been feeling when their dad proved that he wasn’t dull at all.

(TS) Atticus was never described as a dare devil in To Kill A Mockingbird. (CM) He was the solid, dependable, respectable lawyer who came home and read the night away. (CM) He was an old father, a good businessman, a decent pillar of the community…so why was he able to shoot a mad dog dead with just one bullet? (SD) Atticus seems to loath violence. (CM) His children never sport bruises or black eyes, no matter how much trouble they get into and when mad Tim Johnson comes alisting down the street, he is hesitant to kill the dog. (CM) Mockingbirds fly freely in his backyard and he even warns his children away from killing them when he hands them air rifles as Christmas presents. (SD) So imagine what a shock it must have been to poor Scout and Jem when their father turns out to have been nicknamed “Ole One Shot Finch”! (CM) Why, Atticus even “considered it a waste of ammunition when he fired 15 shots and hit 14 birds”. (CM) The only thing that I wonder now is, why did he stop killing things and when did “Ole One Shot Finch” begin to fade from memory? (CS) Atticus is a stubborn, smart and on top of things type of person and I think that the him described in this book could be his alter ego to his younger self.

(TS) I never thought of my parents as adventuresome, or even surprising people. (CM) They were simply Mom and Dad, who got up, slept, ate, went away and came back as much as the rest of us. (CM)  They were the typical American parents and I never really thought of them as daring or flabbergasting people. (SD) To find out that my mother and father had once gone sky diving was a lot like getting a slap in the face. (CM) My first thought was “Huh?” followed by “But they’re my parents!” (CM) I had never thought of them having lives before I was born, let alone dangerous, risk taking lives! (SD) Then I thought about how they must have been completely different people back then. (CM) They had only one child, they were younger than they are now and they still had a spark of verve in them. (CM) This was like their last adventure and I can’t be creeped out by that because I would want them to have happiness before me. (CS) My parents became considerably cooler when I discovered this good surprise about them.

Whether it’s my parents or Scouts father, the point is that all parents pull good surprises on their kids. Sky diving or shooting better then the U.S Army, it’s all the same in the eyes of a child as long as it’s cool. My parents went sky diving and I thought that was awesome, and Scout and Jem probably thought the same thing. Parents are great for pulling stunning facts out of nowhere that shock and amaze their kids, and that’s what both Atticus and my parents did to us.

            Self Assessment: I'm not certain about this essay. I have some good parts, for instance, my introduction paragraph, but also feel that I slack off a little in the end. It is very difficult for me to write a good concluding paragraph. I also think that I need to work on organization in my essays. I would give myself a C+ for this essay.

      

Outline for 4-Paragraph Essay

Main Point or Thesis of Essay

Finding a Good Surprise About a Parent

Bell word Surprise

Paragraph 1 -- Opening

Hook One time, my parents went skydiving

Comment on the hook I was shocked when I unearthed this fact

Comment on the hook I always thought of my parents as people who would faint if a frog hopped in front of them

Thesis  (with bell word)

I was ecstatic that they were risk takers when they were younger and think that Scout and Jem are equally astounded

Paragraph 2

TS (Main Idea, Topic, or Thesis)

Jem and Scout discover that Atticus has a few bombshells to drop on them

2 Echo words to be used flabbergasted       

disbelief

SD Atticus was “Ole One Shot Finch”

CM Scout is flabbergasted

CM Her dad used to think it was “a waste of ammunition to spend more than 15 bullets on 15 birds”

SD Scout and Jem will never think their father is boring again

CM Atticus used to read all the time

CM Atticus shot a mad dog dead with one bullet and his kids are in a state of disbelief

CS Atticus is different from my initial view of him

                          

Paragraph 3

TS (Main Idea, Topic, or Thesis)

My parents went skydiving

2 Echo words to be used amazed   wonder   

SD My parents were very adventurous

CM I wonder what else they might have done

CM I think that it’s great that they had fun when they were younger

SD I am deathly afraid of heights and could never go skydiving

CM I am amazed at my parents courage

CM I am proud that they can say that they did something exciting now that we live in a typical suburban community

CS My parents are awesome

Paragraph 4

Hook (the same as paragraph 1, or different) My parents went skydiving

Echo word (could be bell word) shock

Comment on the hook To this day I am shocked that they did this

Comment on the hook They were crazy when they were younger

Re-statement, in slightly different words, of the thesis Atticus and my parents both have a few surprises that they hadn’t revealed to their children 

Freestyle Writing: The Full Moon

Sometime, when it is full and bright and glowing, glance up towards the moon and reflect upon it. Note how where the thin strands fall against the dark trees and branches, they look dusted in silver magic. How, when a wolf or dog howls towards it, at least one person around you will shiver involuntarily. How, the world seems to be a different place, more magical, mysterious and ancient under the soft light of a full moon. When I see a full moon, hanging ripe and heavy in the sky, like the last fruit hanging on the vine, my mind fills with muddled thoughts and rambling ideas that trail off into oblivion as soon as they have been thought. I see a powerful beauty, wrapped by a dark black coat speckled carelessly with diamonds that glitter without light. I see a crystal ball glowing with secrets, nestled on an inky tablecloth with shards of glass sprinkled around. I see a milky eye looking down at the sleeping world in an ebony face that shines with the ebbing light of old age. I see a ripped and punctured cloth devoid of light except for the tears that shine white and clear through the dark, the largest glistening with an unearthly light that soothes the eyes. I see a gateway to heaven, a doorway to peace, an entrance to love and happiness and a window to the purest soul that breathes. I see something in the full moon looming in the night sky that no poet or songwriter could describe if they were given eternity to try.

Tears and TKAM

An Essay Reflecting on Crying

By Jennifer Carroll

Essay #5

Pine Point School

10/12/10

(TS) Jem Finch and crying don't exactly go hand and hand. (CM) They are polar opposites and before I read the end of Chapter Seven in To Kill A Mockingbird, I would have thought that Jem would rather cut off his nose than cry. (CM) He is such a tough, brutally determined boy, but his tears put him in a softer light, one I'm not exactly sure he would enjoy being seen in. (CS) In the following words you will read, I will speak not only about my thoughts on Jem's tears, but also my thoughts on crying itself.
(TS) Crying is a part of human nature. (CM) Everyone has cried over a broken toy, a lost opportunity or love, a death, and even tears of joy sometimes escape us. (CM) Tears show a range of emotion in us, that something has touched our souls, for better or worse. (SD) When Jem, in To Kill A Mockingbird, comes into the house, Scout immediately knows that he has been crying. (CM) She might've thought this because when he came into the house, his face was streaked and blotchy. (CM) Then again, Scout herself says that she "thought it odd that I had not heard him", so maybe he was doing something else that made his face look like he had been crying. (SD) Seeing Jem cry must have shaken up Scout quite a bit. (CM) Jem is her older, smart and brave brother and she looks up to him more than I think she is aware of herself. (CM) However, Scout is growing into a capable and responsible little girl, so maybe she just felt sad and wanted to help him. (CS) It seems that crying in this time period is looked on as a weakness for boys, so I feel bad for Jem, as he must have been very upset to shed tears.
(TS) Crying is, in my opinion, something that should happen at only the most devastating of times. (CM) I see crying as a type of weakness, although not something to be frowned upon. (CM) I just believe that it is very difficult for someone to view you as a strong individual if you are crying into a tissue in front of them. (SD) For instance, women find it okay to cry, because it is a healthy release of cooped up emotions and comforting in a way. (CM) Men, on the other hand, seem to shy away from crying, looking on it as a weak and shameful thing to do. (CM) Automatically, this leads to history making men look strong and brave in the face of a crisis and women as people whose eyes should be shielded from the world because it could upset them. (SD) I have only seen my mother cry once. (CM) My mom was in the car taking us to school and she was arguing with my brother about his gaming on weekdays, which my dad had agreed to behind her back. (CM) I looked up during a particularly loud bit, and noticed that her eyes were shiny and wet. (CM) I am ashamed to say that I tried to ignore it and, as her voice hitched,  I buried myself in my book hoping that it wasn't happening and that everything was still normal. (CS) That happening with my mother just made my view on crying sharper and more in focus, because it didn't gain her any ground and if I cry, it doesn't gain me any either.
(TS) Jem is nothing but a stalwart and brave boy, and his tears only add to bravery in a way that I'm not sure the strongest bodybuilder could understand. (CM) He may consider them a weakness, and I too think that tears should avoided when possible, but his make him seem younger and more how he should be at his age. (CM) In To Kill A Mockingbird, young people seem that they would rather die then be seen crying, especially boys, and I don't think that it is healthy for them. (CS) Jem's tears make him look like the boy he should be and not the man he tries to be, but I still believe that crying is, while natural and healthy, something that should not be strived for.


Summary: I don't really think that this is one of my better essays. For one, I think that my concluding paragraph is confusing and that I ramble a little. I keep trying to improve my concluding paragraphs and shall continue to do so. I do like my first body paragraph though, because I think that it has some great describing words and that I voice my ideas clearly and smoothly. I would give myself a B- for this essay.

The Line Between Fun and Disrespect:

An Essay Examining the Treatment of Boo Radly 

By Jennifer Carroll

8th Grade English

Pine Point School

October 5, 2010

         (TS) Boo Radly is a creature steeped in mystery and horror to the small town of Maycomb County. Raised off of legends and stories, children can be expected to be curious and frightened of the Radly house and of Boo himself. Listening eagerly to gossip, making up games to play about the family, saying that their pecans were poisoned and that Boo ate raw animals, some might go a little beyond curious and fancy themselves daring adventurers. They invade his privacy but always stay at a safe distance, where Scout, Jem and Dill go beyond privacy invasion and straight on to disrespect.

        (TS) Maycomb is a small town, where everybody knows the secrets and misdoings of neighbors. (CM) Boo Radly is a topic of heated discussion among gossips and an object of horror and terror for the children. (CM) The tales they tell, from poisoned pecans to eating raw animals has put him in a dark light for some. (SD) Dill has a borderline obsession with poor Boo and is relentless in his plans for seeing him. (CM) Jem and Scout are party to this but Dill is obviously the main source behind the ideas and staring.(CM) At first it was a game, something to boast about and laugh at in later times, but now has become more of a hunt to Dill, with Boo the prize and the prey. (SD) The insolence that Dill, Jem and Scout are showing this poor man is staggering. (CM) They are acting like tiny stalkers, frenzied in their search for a glimpse of the mysterious Boo Radly. (CM)Peeking into his windows, sneaking into his property, daring each other to touch his house...they show no deference or anything but contempt for his privacy. (CS) Treating a persons life as a toy to whittle away long hours and boredom is disgusting and I am ashamed of them for acting this way.
        (TS) Boo is a human being. He is strange, bizarre and possibly mentally challenged but he is not a monster or a devil of any kind. He deserves to be treated with respect and people should oblige his obvious wishes to be left alone. Scout, Jem and Dill are being cruel and mean to this poor man, no matter how mysterious he is.


Self Assessment: I like this essay because I think I was descriptive and followed the instructions well. I don't really like my chunk on Dill and I think that my concluding paragraph could be better, but I am working on that. I would give myself a B- for this essay.

                                                                    Lion Heart

                                       A Metaphoric Essay Describing Myself as a Lion

                                                               By Jennifer Carroll

                                                                  English Class

                                                               Pine Point School

                                                                 October 4, 2010

    The definition of a lion, according to Webster is, "a large, usually tawny-yellow cat, Panthera leo,    native to Africa and southern Asia, having a tufted tail and, in the male, a large mane." This blandly informative statement captures nothing more than a quick sketch of the creature. It does not tell of the calculating amber eyes, the strong muscles beneath the tawny-yellow fur, or of the big heart beneath it all, pumping fiercely away, full of life, pride and cunning. The same thing can be said for me, Jennifer Carroll, 14 year old girl with blond hair and a liking for candy. 

     (TS) Lions are famed hunters, ferocious fighters and often called the noblest cats in the food chain. (CM) I liken myself to these majestic creatures because they are proud, aloof animals. (CM) The videos shown of them hunting down their prey demand my attention and I love how when the hunt is over, they seem almost smug, uncaring of any other beings troubles. (SD) Their golden fur and thick tangled manes remind me of my own blond hair a lot. (CM) Whenever I see pictures of them on TV or in magazines and books, the detail that draws my eye to them has always been their spectacular flaxen fur. (CM) That has always been the same with me; people who are don't know my name and try to describe me to others always say, "She has blond hair..." first and foremost. (SD) Also, their readiness to fight for honor makes me think of myself. (CM) Lions always are prepared for battle and the smallest grievances and don't have a calm temper. (CM) Whenever I think I've been wronged my first instinct is to jump up and start swinging. (SD) Another thing that makes me think of lions when I'm glancing in a mirror is the stride and instinct. (CM) Lions walk stealthily, with a grace and arrogance that hunting demands and when I'm trying to be quiet or sneak up on someone, I find myself slipping into a similar gait. (CM) This and the fact that I have cat like intuition and tend to turn violent when upset makes me, in my eyes, similar to the King of the Jungle. (CS) Lions are wonderfully brazen and dangerous cats and the fact that I can find all these similarities between them and myself makes me almost absurdly happy.

  The second definition in Webster for lion is, "a man of great strength, courage, etc." I don't know so much about a man, but I feel that this description from Webster fits me perfectly.  One Webster definition describes the big cat, so powerful underneath the Savannah sun, while the other describes the blonde girl from Connecticut, nowhere near the sun in the winter. Both of us, while different in form, power and blood, share the same mind and soul, angry yet able to relax and be happy and fierce in the way that we would fight to the death for those we love.

Self Assesment: I would give myself a B for this essay. I really like my opening paragraph because I feel that it is descriptive and catchy. I think my closing paragraph is weak because the last chunk doesn't seem to fit well with the rest. I don't like the concluding sentence but I'm working on those to make them more interesting and complete.